I think it's the law of attraction that keeps attracting me to people with a little twitch or really, really hyper and funny. I get them stoned and I just ignite my awareness (if that makes sense to any of you) and I can pick on little cues that makes them stick out like a sore thumb. Little by little I release what I know and then it gets a little emotional with young ones, but I tell them to not be afraid of the things they see or feel, but instead have fun with it. I also tell them I been practicing this solely off internet info.
See I was going through a LOT of depressions and suicidal thoughts; I thought it was all the research I do and I thought my mind had finally reached its limit so I gave up on reading materials online only because everything makes sense (it gets hard holding everything in mind ram (that's how I explain it lol)) and there is too much material that I feel a vibe they are misleading. When I feel drained from studies, I now take a walk instead of trying to cram it.
Out of this, I've also learned that my mind is my enemy; the way I get by sometimes is by not thinking about the past and just accept that my world has completely changed in one month.
Let me embrace a little on the studies I been doing for the past six years (I am 24). Physics, quantum physics, cosmology, astrology, philosophy, the bible, psychology, domestic issues, emotional effects in group individuals on a global scale, real estate, I am a computer technician and I also repair cell phones, keyboarding, I am 100% fluent in English and Spanish, I love to make money (I don't have a greed for it it's just fun because I can make it), ect.. ect.. I only have two years of college because I always disliked the system and the idiotic classes they were making me take. I said fuck that! and decided to do my own studies as I form my independent life.
I am a self-taught computer technician with some background in networking, (honestly it's like a no brainer to me and can't understand why people don't have the attention span to get their creativity kicking and do their thing too).
Long story short I was convinced that I needed school because they had order and I didn't. But now through this path my whole perspective has changed and now seem to believe I'm a lot better off continuing my life unchanged. I do still have mental breakdowns, more frequent now, but I now know it's the demon itself fucking with my heart rate and making my mind feel heavy and blind. I just snap myself back to reality and I smile. I know how to control it (at least for now)
Now I have made it my mission to spot out other indigo's and help them realize their power by being assertive and compassionate with them. Understanding that I don't understand their powers is one of the many things I always keep in my mind. I can feel how powerful their energy is (especially in youngsters 16-17 years old) One friend even senses when I turn my aura on and off, he laughs and I laugh too lol.
Anyways finding these 3 indigo's last night is what helped me wake up with an even bigger smile today :). But I can't live in the past, I must let the that happy emotion stay there and continue searching out more. They follow me like a leader, but I know I know very little. I tell them that we need connections with other indigos and that's why we get depressed, they always get my number down. I have made it my mission to figure myself out while waking others up and sharing my experiences with them. It's like they grow this love for me. I always clarify that all I'm doing is trying to help those asleep to discover their powers, and that I only understand why I feel so they will have to look for their own answers.
Also I got my girlfriend pregnant as soon as I woke up from my slumber.. but the government/clinic said she can't give birth because she has cysts that does not give the baby room. I never applied any pressure of this knowledge to her because it's a tongue that is operating on a different law; she only knows a little of my awakening (a lot actually, but the info I've acquired is too much). Regardless I believe the "medical authorities" know that my baby is a huge indigo and they don't want him to come out. My gf does experience a lot of pains (according to her) but since I'm not the one pregnant, it's not my final decision whether she will take surgery or give me a chance to try and heal her anus/vagina/orange chakra. Regardless I think she will have to get operated only because I fear the system has messed up her body (I don't say this words to her though).
I have learned how to be very, very tactical with my word choice to cause influence. I am a powerful speaker and highly motivational with my believers. I freak people out with my charm and high intelligence. Although I do know that those powers come from my higher self and not me; I know I'm not God, but I follow his words from inside me and not from any other source. I know I have background in bible studies but I rather trust my intuition in all of this.
Anyways I'm having trouble understanding what the fuck is my power lol. I can sense everyone else's when they do something but I just feel it and that's it. I like how I can tell those that are doing something to stop that, they laugh lol. This is fun but it was also so hard to delete who I used to be (even though I am still me lol, but now I feel like my head is holding a house.) please help me guys because the more I understand myself, the more I can lead these children. I tell them to enjoy their lives like they know how but keep in mind that changes are coming, and they are the new evolution; I also clarify that they aren't God.
Help me out by embracing some clues on me, I can decipher them I guess. I mean I am learning that you only learn yourself by yourself, but I don't believe I need to feel like I AM ENTIRELY alone, and if I am, fuck it. My mission stays the same.
Can I add one more thing? lol. I see the fake planes EVERYWHERE!! I mean they even put holograms of old war planes, and don't get me started with the birds. I learned to enjoy the view and joy they bring but keep in mind that I don't understand who or what they are. Also I’d like to know if it's the law of attraction that attracts all these cars to me but I love the attention I get :). So I walk EVERYWHERE now. Trying to make sense of it with patience, trusting that GOD and my higher self will deliver what I need.
Embrace guys. I've only been experience all these changes in one month. I suppose I don't have much problems with all this since I decide to just enjoy life period and look at this as fun..
**now that I reviewed this.. I'm sorry for blabbering away, I got lost in my thoughts and wanted to really express my joys and also my fears.