Isn't Life Amazing...
by Lara Matthews
I thought, many years ago, that ‘Life’ was something that happened to you. I felt restricted by the limits my Parents put on my existence; things like:
“you’ll never survive without a husband”
“you’ll never have a good job unless you pass your exams”
I could go on…..
I remember asking my Mother once whether she had ever really known true happiness in her life. She was in her mid 40’s at the time, and when she replied in the negative, I was surprised. She seemed to have it all. My parents seemed to want for nothing, materialistically. They were about to move abroad to start a more idyllic phase of their existence, and their children had both worked their way through the school system with a decent amount of qualifications which would allow them to ‘get somewhere in life’
…Gobsmacked wasn’t the word… at the thought that my Mother had never experienced what she would consider as being ‘truly happy’.
I really believed my parents words of caution, so got married in order to ‘survive’. My first and second marriages ended in Divorce, yet I had still not learned my lesson. I still thought I needed a man, so drifted from one relationship to the next, looking for sustenance over loving companionship.
To cut a long story short, and after much globe trotting in the name of ‘finding myself’ (still with a man at that time…. I hate to admit) I found myself in the Caribbean. Let me just add that living there is nothing like the picture postcard existence we all dream about…
As I look back, I can see so many occasions where the Universe made it perfectly clear that I could actually make it on my own. I guess I just wasn’t listening very well. I think the Universe must have considered ‘desperate times call for desperate measures’, so took me to a tiny island, where people spoke a foreign language, and the life style was so different from my own. It so wanted to prove its point that I could actually survive very well on my own, that it put me in a position that would make most people throw their hands up in despair, just to prove its point.
After seven of years of living a less than idyllic existence, with my traveling partner, and after having spent the previous two living hand to mouth, sometimes with nothing to actually put in said mouth, I began to think, nay, believe that I could have a much better quality of life if I actually was on my own.
The thought of being on my own for the first time in my life, quite frankly freaked me out. I had never before been ‘alone’ – I had spent the first 20 years of my life with my parents, and the next 19 living with someone (actually, several different ‘someones’).
The more I thought about being on my own, the more I thought I must be going through some mid life crisis. Through all this though, a little voice was trying to reassure me that “yes”, there was more to life than this for me, and “YES” I could do it…..
Then all of a sudden, when I began to convince myself I could do it, I got a great job; found an apartment, and (this is the best bit) actually had money left to spare after going to the expense of moving, and all that that entailed.
My self confidence knew no bounds… I also actually began to like using the language of the island I was living on. Before the idea of speaking a language other than my own intimidated me, but all of a sudden I was, dare I say it, managing on my own. Not only was I managing, I was negotiating house insurance, health insurance, and communicating with utility providers in a foreign language. There was no stopping me.
I was really enjoying my new existence. I was independent, I was ‘free’. The last thing I needed was a man. The Universe obviously thought differently...
After being given a taste of my wonderful new single life, I met Mr Right…
I didn’t think, or rather want to think that there was the remotest possibility that he could be anything other than a friend, or at the very least a distant boyfriend… given my previous less than successful co-dependent 19 or so years of my life… But this time there was a difference. While I was not out there looking for a man (I thought that I needed a man like a hole in the head at this point), at this time in my life, I was seeing things from a very different perspective.
I was the ‘single, thirty-something, knocking-on-the-door-of-forty, financially-independent, happy go lucky, happy to be without a man, girl about town. BUT having a little r and r buddy couldn’t do me any harm…could it???
As I got to know the man I had begun dating, I struggled to keep things on ‘a friendly’ level. The last thing I needed (I thought) was another relationship.
Again, the Universe had other plans. It did take me a while to ‘cotton-on' to what I was apparently being told…
This time I was embarking on a relationship from a completely different perspective. I was looking for love, not sustenance, and this time it worked.
There are so many other areas of my life where I have also broken the mold of the mental constraints that were put on my life from an early age. Just by believing that I have every right to be happy, my life has turned around. I now work, doing something I love (I am an artist and internet psychic), I am still traveling, and I am living with (and am married to) the most amazing man, because I love him and want to be with him.
From my personal experience, I hope that some may feel inspired to make some life style changes of their own.
Believe in your dreams, they really can come true. You do have complete control over, and you really do choose your existence.
Start with the small changes you wish to make. You will be amazed at where they will take you.
And remember, the Universe never throws more at you than you can handle…..
Find Psychic Lara on Kasamba
and search name: Orbital Empathy