My first Medium experience came in 1970. Having no awareness; I read everything I could find. It was a confusing time. I found myself led to people and places, by the Dead Entities wanting to get through to loved ones. The experience was toward negative, in that, I experienced feelings of suffocation from a man who died in a fire, or I would experience craving for a cigarette, etc. The, "White Light" and other, "Spiritual Approach" (what didn't I try?) kept the experience still in the realm of: "Weird and unnatural".
In 1971, I was interviewed by Dr. Thelma Moss, who was then professor of Parapsychology at UCLA and known for ESP experiments with her class and the Air Force in Colorado. She interviewed me at her home in Brentwood. She said because she could lose her position if she admitted to believing in Mediumship. I had received messages from JFK. (By the way, people whose' image remains alive after death, are easiest to reach; therefore, my reluctance to recognize his contact, as something my imagination may have conjured up, was incorrect.) Dr. Moss considered the messages to appear very real. (I have a copy of the writing not her recording of the interview.)
Later when I visited a Library, hoping to find a sample of JFK signature to compare to what I received, I was lead to a strange area of the library which was about inventions. Imagine? I reached up and pulled down a book, that showed a machine that duplicates signatures of the Well-known. Therein, was the John Kennedy signature, which was, indeed similar? Another time, I accidently came upon a Newspaper column, talking about famous doodles. (I had, and still have paper where he showed me his doodle). The article was months later and spoke of "Rectangles interspersed with triangles, or Sail Boat appearing. This Describes My Doodle!
Above are quick samples. Over the years, I have not incorporated my abilities, as who I am, to others. I do talk comfortably in detailed writing to personal friends and family members no longer in the body, and often "Known" people visit. In both cases, I can recognize their personalities as different from my own, and therefore can visit.
I am 73 now. Most of my studies and awareness are done strictly on my own. The contradiction in my life is that I live, somewhat isolated, and I have less and less need for much that occupies those around me.
I feel in no way superior, nor I do identify with most of the concepts, accepted in the psychic realms. The “Sixth Sense", unlike the sense of hearing, sight, etc. is not in a constant "On" position. I'd like those who integrate
it in their natural life, to share the truth of how it does not lend itself to the testing of regular senses. Although, with all the recent innovations, more should be available along those lines.
I have seen cars and houses appear in my life, exactly as ordered (or better). Yet, often when I want to make something happen; it does not. I have adult children, both of whom have addictions and personality disorders, and I have been ineffectual in helping.
I communicate with animals, even hearing of their ear infections, or having them teach me a new game with their ball. For a time, years back, I was so tuned into who was on the phone that my sister, who shared my apartment, then, got mad when I didn't know. I have produced poems which convey messages or direct help for those in need..etc. Being a conduit for help is great, but I simply feel no personal need for credit.
Few know of my extra senses, nor do I consider them outside the "Norm".
I wonder at the fact that I have less need to be the benefactor to others.
Oddly, I see people as neither Pitiful nor "Needy". Self-responsibility can be undermined by those who need to be "Needed". I see people who may not look successful by our Earthly standards; overcoming personal trials another may not see. Or I see, a “Do Gooder 's” need to feel they are "OK" by seeking those who Society deems "Not OK".
In my own adult children, I see them fighting "Inclinations" of which I have not been faced. My approach was "Understanding" and supporting them against the world. Now??? All I know is over twenty years; little of what I did helped, and I now explore, the possibility that, my help, did, indeed hinder, their need to find their own personal resources.
I Thank you for the forum, to express the above. It is the first time, I have done so.
I like saying. “I AM" in this day of "Initials." It means. The world each of us looks out upon .."Is About Me."
Example: If I receive no feedback from what is written here? The writing alone, gave me a clarity in simple form, I hadn't realized.
It's About Me... What reader receives or does? About them.
"Balance is the Default Position of the Universe"..
It does seem that all exists. We are not looking for answers; we need only uncover what is already known.
Difficult to pick a spoonful of the Ocean of Experiences afforded this one person, yet, a pebble if felt by the tender- foot, regardless of the path chosen.
Pleased to have found your forum. Thank you.