About 2 years ago I was having a really hard time in life. My son is bipolar and I was at my wits end. I mean I was really at the end. I was so depressed from the day to day hopelessness of raising a bipolar child that I had even considered suicide. I felt very alone and I knew then that this was my battle too not just his.
To back up a little, my aunt committed suicide about 25 years ago. I wasn't especially close to her, but always remembered her as sweet and caring. I had a dream one night that I was in this house that wasn't mine, but I felt "at home" in. Someone started knocking on the door, and I asked "who is it"? The person on the other side of the door said, "It's me, your aunt Nancy, let me in". I felt a little scared and confused about whether to open the door or not and I can't say why. She emphatically said again "please let me in, I just want to help you."
After this exchange happened a few times I suddenly woke up. I didn't feel scared after waking, just surprise and wonder that she had come to me. In my dreaming conscious mind I think that I would not open the door because I was scared that she wanted to take me with her and I really wasn't ready to go yet. I have tried to dream about her again but it hasn't happened yet. What does this all mean? Any ideas out there?
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