Yesterday I came across the term "Indigo child" for the first time. I read everything I could on it, eyes widening and jaw dropping more and more as I came to the realization that I am Indigo. The moment I read the characteristics everything seemed to fall into place. I wanted to cry! I wanted to laugh! I wanted to scream!
I remember sleepless nights spent in utter despair because I hated the world. I would think "I don't want to be here!! everybody is so materialistic and judgmental and rude! Why can't they see the beauty in the world??? I'm not like them at all and I just want to leave! Why am I here????" But other days I would just as soon see the great promise humanity holds if they were just steered in the right direction. I've always wanted to know why I was here because I knew it wasn't to pass high school, go to college, get a 9-5 and a supportive husband. I've never wanted that at all.
I want to know what I'm supposed to be doing to fulfill my Indigo role. I'm not a "sunny rainbow and daffodils" kind of person so when I read the kind of stuff saying that Indigos could do things like smile at people randomly or go up and talk with someone who looks down. I just felt it wasn't for me. I mean, If I were feeling down, I wouldn't want to talk to anyone. So why would I disturb this already disturbed person, ya know? Jeesh, I just don't know what I'm supposed to be doing here. Even though I'm 100 times less stressed with the knawing question, "why the heck am I so different?" I have a new question know. "What the heck am I supposed to DO???" I guess answers will come with time.
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